Never again will I judge someone solely on the appearance of their horse.
In my smug arrogance, I have always looked at horses and thought well, or ill of their owners, based solely on what lay before me. If the horse looked skinny, or ill cared for, in my mind, their owner sucked...shouldn't be allowed to have horses. If the horse looked fine, then surely their owner must be A-OK.
After dealing with Baxter for the last week, I have learned that sometimes there is a reason for a horse to look like it's owner is neglecting it's care. I now know that sometimes, you just have to do what you can, and hope that it's enough, even though it doesn't seem that it could be.
I am so unhappy with the whole situation. If I walked into a field and saw a horse that looks like Baxter does right now, I would be totally disgusted with it's owner. I am so stressed by this entire train wreck. At least he is eating the antibiotic, thank goodness. He seems to be fine, other than a slight limp. There is not a lot of swelling. There is a ton of exudate, but I cannot do more than a quick swipe of the wound dressing before he takes off again.
It is incredibly depressing. There is nothing like a 1200 pound animal with a brain the size of a ping-pong ball to make one feel totally inadequate and right now that is how i feel.
6 comments:
Hangg in there girl. I know all too well how you feel. When Shaqerriae tried to amputate her leg and came close to bleeding out I was at my end. She looked like a Holocaust victim for a couple for months. Today she is fabulous and healthy- as will Baxter be! You are one of the best horse moms I know. Don't ever second guess your quality of care!
Kristi
You are right, things are rarely how they look at first glance.
I know you are doing a great job with Baxter and he is going to be fine.
I know he is
You do the best you can with what you have. You love him and take good care of him so leave the rest alone.
Thanks Kristi. It is hard for me to have to give him what I consider to be less than good care, but I have resigned myself to the fact that I can only do what I can do. He will get better, and I will get over it. I just hate seeing him hurt. It kills me. This is why I do not have children.....
Paige, you are the voice of reason. I know you are right, but it is sometimes hard to see the end of something, especially when you have little or no control. I am doing better. He is doing better. It will be fine eventually.
Thanks Holly! I am trying to. It isn't easy for a control freak to have no control. I will get there :)
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